If I may quote the Emperor 😉
Sometimes, when you are used to being powerless, you can find yourself giving up.
Giving up on growing.
Giving up on healing.
Giving up on things that make you, . . . well, . . . you.
When that happens, finding your way back to a healthy place can be the hardest challenge you’ve ever faced. It doesn’t matter how old you are or what horrors you’ve faced; this can Trump (ha ha [not 😦 ] ) them all.
In order to survive, steps must be taken.
The first thing you have to do is identify what it is in your life that is causing you to behave in the ways that are making you unhappy. You have to identify when you gave up your power over yourself, and why you did it.
Then, you have to decide if you matter enough- to yourself- to take the necessary actions to put yourself back on a healthy path.
Extremely, and sometimes, insurmountably. Sometimes, you just can’t fathom that you mean that much to anyone else; why should you matter that much to yourself?
It’s also soooo easy to sacrifice one’s self for others. To believe that they are more worthy of existence (and the best of it, by the way) than you are. But, my dear, in this instance, you are so, so wrong.
The truth is, you matter.
You matter to those who love you.
You matter to those whose lives you’ve touched, or will touch.
Most of all, you matter to you. . .
Or, if not, you totally should.
Let’s let that sink in, shall we?
Letting it . . .
Now that that is over, let me clarify:
I’m not advocating selfish behavior that puts everyone else on earth beneath you on the priority scale; that’s just nasty. People like that make me cranky. 😦
There is no reason to accept abuse, no matter how old you are, nor who it comes from.
With that said, I reclaim what was mine: my writing. My love of cooking. My love of music. My confidence in the fact that I AM a good parent. My love of Life. My love of myself. My love of humanity.
-Good night; it’s late here. 🙂